Why is a raven like a writing desk?

Photo

Tue, 21 May 2013 20:51:58 -0400

exp3ctopatr0num: Such beautiful homes. One day I hope to own a...

Tue, 21 May 2013 18:43:23 -0400

exp3ctopatr0num:

Such beautiful homes. One day I hope to own a victorian house!

So much want.

trustisforfools: mrspiritual: musicalpandas: gainingconfidence...

Tue, 21 May 2013 14:36:14 -0400

trustisforfools:

mrspiritual:

musicalpandas:

gainingconfidencexo:

havocados:

emorenita:

why aren’t these being reblogged more often?
i rather see these than “keys in hand”

Fatality

Umm so since I’m stupid could someone kindly explain each step for me like step 3 am i head butting him in the face or the chest?

I think it depends on the height of the person, but I suppose the head is a more effective target. I hope this helps :)

Step 1: Step back the moment he reaches for you.

Step 2: Duck!

Step 3: Head butt him in the chin. It’s very important that it is the chin and not the chest because it is much more uncomfortable and disorienting to have your teeth bang together especially if it cuts his tongue (which it will if it is in the way). More than likely height won’t matter. He will be leaning forward from the missed attempt at grabbing you.

Step 4: Knee him in the balls.

Step 5: When he doubles over, jab him on his back. I believe at the base of the neck just above the shoulder blades would be best. I’m not an expert, but this seems like the best place, imo.

Step 6: Don’t lose contact. Bring your other hand over and slam your hands against the sides of his heads as hard as possible. Right on the ears is the best place; it is extremely disorienting if done correctly. Then take his head and bring it down on your knee as you bring your knee up. It’s very important that you avoid the nose because if you knee his nose it will definitely break and more than likely the bones will stab his brain killing him, so aim for his mouth instead.

Step 7: Keep your knee up and bring your foot out to kick him over. Personally, I don’t like the image because it looks like she kicked him with her toes. You do not want to do that. Instead kick him with the ball or heel of your foot and put power behind it with a push.

Step 8: He is on the ground. You could probably stop here and he would get the picture, but if you really want to…Your leg is still in the air from the kick. With all your force slam the edge of your your heel on his side. It will be more effective if you lower your body first by bending at the knee of the leg your weight is on. Done right, you can break a rib or two.

reblogging again for that^

Reblog this if you like Supernatural. No questions, just do. It'll make sense later.

Mon, 20 May 2013 04:31:18 -0400

fallenfromthetardis:

lordzantrifreya:

how could one not reblog this?

I hope this is as fruitful as the Harry Potter one.

alicelostinneverland: merlinwhosuperpotterlock: I actually...

Mon, 20 May 2013 02:36:12 -0400

alicelostinneverland:

merlinwhosuperpotterlock:

I actually think this was pretty responsible. Rather than banning it outright, which would result in kids wanting to rebel even more, she offers it in her home where she can control the amount people drink. Good on ya, Mrs George. You’re a cool mom.

She also offered her daughter a condom when she was hooking up with a guy instead of freaking out and kicking the guy out of the house.

Lmao my mom.

blissfulbambi: koffae: endlesslyhorany: justincatman: They...

Mon, 20 May 2013 02:31:02 -0400

blissfulbambi:

koffae:

endlesslyhorany:

justincatman:

They told me the big black Lab’s name was Reggie, as I looked at him lying in his pen. The shelter was clean, no-kill, and the people really friendly. I’d only been in the area for six months, but everywhere I went in the small college town, people were welcoming and open. Everyone waves when you pass them on the street.

But something was still missing as I attempted to settle in to my new life here, and I thought a dog couldn’t hurt. Give me someone to talk to. And I had just seen Reggie’s advertisement on the local news. The shelter said they had received numerous calls right after, but they said the people who had come down to see him just didn’t look like “Lab people,” whatever that meant. They must’ve thought I did.

But at first, I thought the shelter had misjudged me in giving me Reggie and his things, which consisted of a dog pad, bag of toys almost all of which were brand new tennis balls, his dishes and a sealed letter from his previous owner.

See, Reggie and I didn’t really hit it off when we got home. We struggled for two weeks (which is how long the shelter told me to give him to adjust to his new home). Maybe it was the fact that I was trying to adjust, too.
Maybe we were too much alike.

I saw the sealed envelope. I had completely forgotten about that. “Okay, Reggie,” I said out loud, “let’s see if your previous owner has any advice.”
____________ _________ _________ _________

To Whomever Gets My Dog:

Well, I can’t say that I’m happy you’re reading this, a letter I told the shelter could only be opened by Reggie’s new owner. I’m not even happy writing it. He knew something was different.

So let me tell you about my Lab in the hopes that it will help you bond with him and he with you.

First, he loves tennis balls. The more the merrier. Sometimes I think he’s part squirrel, the way he hoards them. He usually always has two in his mouth, and he tries to get a third in there. Hasn’t done it yet. Doesn’t
matter where you throw them, he’ll bound after them, so be careful. Don’t do it by any roads.

Next, commands. Reggie knows the obvious ones —-“sit,” “stay,” “come,” “heel.”

He knows hand signals, too: He knows “ball” and “food” and “bone” and “treat” like nobody’s business.

Feeding schedule: twice a day, regular store-bought stuff; the shelter has the brand.

He’s up on his shots. Be forewarned: Reggie hates the vet. Good luck getting him in the car. I don’t know how he knows when it’s time to go to the vet, but he knows.

Finally, give him some time. It’s only been Reggie and me for his whole life. He’s gone everywhere with me, so please include him on your daily car rides if you can. He sits well in the backseat, and he doesn’t bark or complain. He just loves to be around people, and me most especially.

And that’s why I need to share one more bit of info with you…His name’s not Reggie. He’s a smart dog, he’ll get used to it and will respond to it, of that I have no doubt. But I just couldn’t bear to give them his real name. But if someone is reading this … well it means that his new owner should know his real name. His real name is “Tank.” Because, that is what I drive.

I told the shelter that they couldn’t make “Reggie” available for adoption until they received word from my company commander. You see, my parents are gone, I have no siblings, no one I could’ve left Tank with .. and it was my only real request of the Army upon my deployment to Iraq, that they make one phone call to the shelter … in the “event” … to tell them that Tank could be put up for adoption. Luckily, my CO is a dog-guy, too, and he knew where my platoon was headed. He said he’d do it personally. And if you’re reading this, then he made good on his word.

Tank has been my family for the last six years, almost as long as the Army has been my family. And now I hope and pray that you make him part of your family, too, and that he will adjust and come to love you the same way he
loved me.

If I have to give up Tank to keep those terrible people from coming to the US I am glad to have done so. He is my example of service and of love. I hope I honored him by my service to my country and comrades.

All right, that’s enough. I deploy this evening and have to drop this letter off at the shelter. Maybe I’ll peek in on him and see if he finally got that third tennis ball in his mouth.

Good luck with Tank. Give him a good home, and give him an extra kiss goodnight - every night - from me.

Thank you,

Paul Mallory
____________ _________ _________ _______

I folded the letter and slipped it back in the envelope. Sure, I had heard of Paul Mallory, everyone in town knew him, even new people like me. Local kid, killed in Iraq a few months ago and posthumously earning the Silver
Star when he gave his life to save three buddies. Flags had been at half-mast all summer.

I leaned forward in my chair and rested my elbows on my knees, staring at the dog.

“Hey, Tank,” I said quietly.

The dog’s head whipped up, his ears cocked and his eyes bright.

“C’mere boy.”

He was instantly on his feet, his nails clicking on the hardwood floor. He sat in front of me, his head tilted, searching for the name he hadn’t heard in months. “Tank,” I whispered.

His tail swished.

I kept whispering his name, over and over, and each time, his ears lowered, his eyes softened, and his posture relaxed as a wave of contentment just seemed to flood him. I stroked his ears, rubbed his shoulders, buried my
face into his scruff and hugged him.

“It’s me now, Tank, just you and me. Your old pal gave you to me.” Tank reached up and licked my cheek.

“So whatdaya say we play some ball?” His ears perked again.

“Yeah? Ball? You like that? Ball?”

Tank tore from my hands and disappeared into the next room. And when he came back, he had three tennis balls in his mouth.”

right in the feelings every damn time!

dont even fucking touch me i am crying so hard this is just ugh

Holy shit this is so happy and sad and I just

crying so much

Photo

Sun, 19 May 2013 16:45:13 -0400

Photo

Sun, 19 May 2013 16:45:04 -0400

cicatrici-belle: onerecklessbamf: cicatrici-belle: My Mum...

Sun, 19 May 2013 13:16:29 -0400

cicatrici-belle:

onerecklessbamf:

cicatrici-belle:

My Mum said this to me last night. I couldn’t stop crying.

My mom would constantly say this to me and talk about how happy I once was and I broke down crying after trying to explain to her what’s changed without having to actually say what’s changed and I just broke down crying and ran to my room.

aw :(

Photo

Sun, 19 May 2013 13:13:49 -0400

fuckyoutomhiddleston: If yahoo does end up buying tumblr and shuts it down I just wanted everyone...

Sun, 19 May 2013 13:13:25 -0400

fuckyoutomhiddleston:

If yahoo does end up buying tumblr and shuts it down

I just wanted everyone to know that

you’ve all been truly wonderful people

and

it was an honor blogging with you all

skarsgardianangel: romannoodles: madnessinthemusic: duce-juice...

Sun, 19 May 2013 06:14:16 -0400

skarsgardianangel:

romannoodles:

madnessinthemusic:

duce-juice:

Can someone from the sciencey side of tumblr please explain this ?

This is called shape memory. It’s made from an alloy of titanium and nickel (I believe it’s called nitinol). It has the ability to “remember” the shape it’s taken.

When cold you can bend it whatever which way, but once you heat it (or in this case put it in what I presume is hot water) it will take the original shape.

WHAT!!?!?!?!?

theovarianbarbarian: So ponte las pinches pilas y pelame...

Sun, 19 May 2013 06:08:16 -0400

theovarianbarbarian:

So ponte las pinches pilas y pelame baboso!

Photo

Sun, 19 May 2013 04:56:10 -0400

suitboss: Layers | If you know where to buy this cloth or any...

Sun, 19 May 2013 04:35:40 -0400

suitboss:

Layers | If you know where to buy this cloth or any other alike……

More men’s fashion.

the-absolute-best-posts: gigapoodle: OH MY GOD I FOUND IT

Sun, 19 May 2013 03:38:38 -0400

the-absolute-best-posts:

gigapoodle:

OH MY GOD I FOUND IT

Tumblr Code.

Sun, 19 May 2013 03:24:32 -0400

If I ever see any of you in public, the code is “I like your shoelaces”
that way we know we’re from tumblr without revealing anything

I’m just going to say this to strangers until i find a tumblr person

must keep reblogering!! Im going to be so suspicious if any one tells me this now!

Remember the answer is: I stole them from the president.

Photo

Sun, 19 May 2013 02:10:22 -0400

phoenios: Team Rocket burns you at the speed of light.

Sat, 18 May 2013 17:56:07 -0400

phoenios:

Team Rocket burns you at the speed of light.

weasleypatronus: secretlymisha: as far as i can tell from my dash there’s some sort of gay musical...

Sat, 18 May 2013 17:55:16 -0400

weasleypatronus:

secretlymisha:

as far as i can tell from my dash there’s some sort of gay musical olympics going on that only europe was invited to

welcome to fucking Europe bitches LETS SING